What’s In The Crockpot? Part Ten

March 25, 2014

It’s the milestone tenth installment of “What’s In The Crockpot?” and I’m elated, because this is a good one. I’ll waste no more time… let’s play!

WHAT’S IN THE CROCKPOT?

silver-crockpot

 

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What’s in the Crockpot? Part Nine

October 7, 2013

All of you that are counting the days at home know that it’s been six long months since we’ve played a riveting, edge-of-your-seat game of What’s in the Crockpot? If you missed Part Eight, have no fear – just click right here. That’s right, I rhymed. And if you’d like to peruse my entire collection of crockpot recipes (and you know you do), then just hold your horses, because I’m in the process of creating a brand-spankin’-new Recipes page, and hopefully I should have that up this week.

In the meantime, turn off your Playstation, because this game is all you need for hours of fun game action. Are you ready? You’ll learn the rules quick enough, trust me.

WHAT’S IN THE CROCKPOT?

crockpot-slow-cooker

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What’s in the Crockpot? Part Eight

April 16, 2013

We haven’t played ‘What’s in the Crockpot?’ in months! Time to fix that. Ready for a new installment? It’s easy to play. I won’t even have to explain the rules – you’ll pick it up as you go. I promise!

READY TO GO? LET’S PLAY!

What’s in the Crockpot?

IMG_5658

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October Weight Loss Chart Update AND Crockpot Ratatatatatatouille

October 1, 2012

I’ve been trying to focus on the positive the past few days, because it regards to my eating and exercise, it hasn’t been a fantastic few days.

I delayed this post a day so I could include the results of my October 1st weigh-in. Let’s see what the ol’ weight loss chart has to say, shall we?

Up three pounds. That’s five pounds that I’ve gained over the past two months. No bueno.  And here’s the crappy part about having a weight loss chart… it only took me approximately 15 seconds to realize that this is the heaviest I’ve been in about 18 months. The last time I weighed 241 pounds was March 2011.

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What’s In The (Brand-New) Crockpot? Part Seven

July 17, 2012

On Sunday I got to break in my brand new fancy-pants Crockpot! It was a very exciting day. I couldn’t wait to pull that lid off and sample the contents, but I had to endure hours and hours of waiting, because as you know, Crockpots don’t cook things fast. They cook them slow… which is why they’re also known as slow cookers (whoever thought that name up should definitely get bonus points).

So… are you ready? Ready for the first-ever edition of this game that features my brand-new crockpot? Strap on your knee and elbow pads, because it’s time to play!

WHAT’S IN THE CROCKPOT?

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My New Toy!

July 14, 2012

I’m as excited as a hooker at a Secret Service retreat because… I GOT A NEW TOY!  Wanna guess what it is? I’ll give you a hint… it’s to use in my kitchen.

Need another hint?

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What’s In The Crockpot? Part Six

June 26, 2012

A big thank you to everyone who sent good thoughts my way yesterday. My first day at the new job was great – I met a lot of great new colleagues and absorbed a lot of info… now, onto Day 2!

Like I mentioned in yesterday’s post, I spent part of my Sunday loading up my crockpot to make some meals to eat throughout the week. There’s no better way to reveal my crockpottery than by playing a riveting, edge-of-your-seat game of What’s In The Crockpot?!

What’s In The Crockpot? is a spin-off of the very popular, smash hit, blockbuster blog game What’s In The RediSetGo?, all of which are archived here. (I haven’t archived my What’s In The Crockpot? installments yet, but it’s on my list.) If you’ve never played before, hold on to your hat! Don’t worry about the rules – you’ll figure it out quickly. And if you get hooked, click here and here to play a couple more installments!

So stuff some shin guards into your socks, because it’s time to play…

WHAT’S IN THE CROCKPOT?

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What’s In The Crockpot? Part Five

May 21, 2012

Wow. Has been really been 7 months since we last played “What’s In The Crockpot?” It has!  I published Part Four last October 31st – Halloween – and the dish that I featured was what I contributed to a Halloween party potluck (click here to see the recipe – I won’t spoil the game if you haven’t played yet!)

Just because I haven’t published any “What’s In The Crockpot?” posts doesn’t mean that my crockpot has gone unused. I made a perfectly mediocre vegetable and bean stew in it just the other day. But because it was just mediocre (at best), and the internet is already flooded with mediocre recipes (just google Sandra Lee if you need proof), I refrained from blogging about it.

OK, Enough chit-chat. Pull up your socks and lace up your sneakers, because it’s time to play!

WHAT’S IN THE CROCKPOT?

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What’s In The Crockpot? Part Four

October 31, 2011

We haven’t played “What’s In The Crockpot?” since February – where has the time gone?  That doesn’t mean my crockpot has gone unused – I’ve used it a few times, for dishes that turned out wonderfully (like this one) and for dishes that could… um… use a little work (like this one).

I pulled out the crockpot again over the weekend, to make something for the Halloween potluck party I was invited to, and the results were devilishly delicious. Monstrously magnificent. Bloodcurdlingly beyond compare.

OK, enough with the Halloween talk.

Never played “What’s In The Crockpot?” before? Don’t fret. You’ll pick it up as we go along – although, if you’d like some practice, check out these three posts first.

All set? Wonderful. Put on your reflective clothing and wear a jacket if it’s chilly, because it’s time to play!

WHAT’S IN THE CROCKPOT?

GHOULISHLY GLAZED CARROT, PARSNIPS & EYEBALLS* are in the Crockpot!

*not really

It couldn’t have been easier to make, either.  First ingredient? Carrots:

You need 5 cups worth. I used regular carrots, which I peeled and cut on the bias, which is a fancy way of saying that I cut diagonally, for pretty presentation reasons. You could save yourself some trouble and use baby carrots, which are already peeled and washed and ready to go, but I don’t like cooking with baby carrots. I think it looks lazy. And if you happen to think that that rationale is snobby, consider this: regular carrots are way cheaper than baby carrots. I can find regular carrots for 50 cents a pound, whereas baby carrots are $1.50 a pound.

Ingredient #2: Parsnips!

Parsnips are relatively new to me – I don’t think I’d ever had one until a few years ago. They’re kinda like a cross between a carrot and a potato: similar in shape and texture to a carrot, but similar in taste to a potato. Meaning, of course, that they taste like nothing and are disgusting raw. But, like potatoes, they take on flavors well, and so I added some to this recipe (3 cups worth) just to mix it up.

So, to recap, that’s 5 cups of carrots and 3 cups of parsnips in the crockpot:

If you don’t like parsnips, leave ‘em out. If you love parsnips, add more! Aim for around 8 cups of veggies, and you’ll be fine.

Now for the glaze. I started with 1 cup of orange juice, and to that I added 3 tablespoons of honey:

Here’s a tip: if you spritz your tablespoon with Pam before measuring out the honey, the honey won’t stick to the spoon, and all of it will end up in your recipe.

Next, I grated some fresh ginger – about a teaspoon’s worth (although I didn’t measure it, so I can’t be absolutely sure):

I also added 1 teaspoon of cinnamon, and 1/4 teaspoon each of salt and pepper:

I gave it a stir and poured it over the veggies in the crockpot:

I set the crockpot for 4 hours on High, and that’s it! They’re done! Because crockpots leech the liquid out of everything, the glaze was a little thinner than it would have been had you made this same recipe in your oven, but give the dish a good stir before serving and it’s fine.

I made a display card for the potluck:

A day later my cousin had the wonderful idea that I could have actually included eyeballs in the recipe had I thrown in some pearl onions. Dammit – why didn’t I think of that? I was able to put the calories and fat on the card because I had figured it out using an online recipe calculator. The full details:

Tomorrow, I’m sharing picture of my Halloween costume (it’s a good one!). And now, I’m off to the gym!

Keep it up, David!


My Weight Loss in Corn Dogs, Toilet Paper & MORE!

August 14, 2011

I love a good visual weight loss comparison.  These posts are probably the most fun for me to research and compile, so if this is your first time reading one of these posts, then welcome, and enjoy!

The Backstory:  It all began last fall, when a friend and I piled up 147 pounds of dog food as a visual aid to represent the weight that I’d lost at that point.  Since then, I’ve occasionally scoured the internet and calculated all sorts of outrageous and interesting weight loss comparisons, from quarters and Oreos to bowling balls and KFC to Butterfingers and iPads (they’re all archived in My Favorite Posts).

I’m ready for some new comparisons.  Are you?  Let’s see what else there is on this vast planet that also weighs 167 pounds – the amount of weight that I’ve lost!

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, I PRESENT TO YOU, MY WEIGHT LOSS IN…

…CORN DOGS.  It’s state fair season, and I don’t even want to know how many different deep-fried menu items are sold each day.  I did calculate, however, how many corn dogs I’ve lost.  A single corn dog weighs 2 and 2/3 ounces, which means I’ve lost 1,002 corn dogs!

…JERKY.  Jonesin’ for some protein, but don’t want a deep-fried hot dog?  Try some jerky, which is low-calorie, low-fat, and high-protein (it’s also high-sodium, so don’t each tons).  This jumbo bag weighs 6.2 ounces, so I’ve lost 430 jumbo bags of beef jerky!

…TOILET PAPER.  One roll of toilet paper weighs a tad over one-fifth of a pound, which means in total, I’ve lost 795 rolls of toilet paper!   And here’s where it gets really fun: A two-ply roll of toilet paper has 500 sheets, and each sheet measures 4.5 inches square.  That means that if you unrolled one roll of toilet paper, it would be 187.5 feet long.  Unroll 795 rolls of toilet paper, and lay them end to end, and they would stretch 28.23 miles!  That’s the distance across Lake Erie (at its narrowest point)!

The toilet paper fun’s not over yet!  Now that we’ve unrolled 795 rolls, we’re left with 795 cardboard tubes lying around.  Stack them, one on top of another, and they’d reach a height of 298 feet – only 7 feet shorter than the Statue of Liberty from the ground to the tip of her torch!

…MY FRIEND TOM.  A couple weeks ago, my friend Heidi noticed a rare weight-loss-related eclipse.  Her husband Tom reached a weight of 164 pounds (he’s lost more than 55 pounds since January) – which was exactly the amount of weight that I had lost.  It was a short-lived eclipse (the next day I had a weigh-in, and I had lost two more pounds), but his weight and my weight loss are still eerily close, and I can’t imagine carrying Tom around on my back all freakin’ day long.  It might be fun for him, though.

…GASOLINE.  A gallon of gas weighs 6.16 pounds, so I’ve lost slightly more than 27 gallons.  My car gets about 23 miles to a gallon of gas, so 27 gallons would get me from my home in Los Angeles almost all the way (within a few miles) to the Arizona/New Mexico border!

…GIANT OCTOPUS.  The largest species of octopus on the planet is the North Pacific Giant Octopus (Enteroctopus dofleini), and the largest specimen on record tipped the scales at 156.5 pounds.  That is one giant Giant Octopus, and I’ve lost that giant Giant Octopus!  See the Giant Octopus in action.

…CROCKPOTS.  I love my crockpot, and it’s a heavy bugger.  But it’s not as heavy as this top-of-the-line All-Clad Deluxe Slow Cooker, which sells at Williams-Sonoma for $280 (!) and weighs 18 pounds!  So I’ve lost NINE of them.

…CHEEZ-ITS.  One of my favorite crackers.  A box of regular Cheez-its weighs 9 ounces, so I’ve lost 296 boxes.  Wanna know the damage if you eat 296 boxes of Cheez-its?  A grand total of 399,600 calories and 21,312 grams of fat!  If you’re watching your figure and choose to eat 296 boxes of the reduced-fat variety, you’ll only take in 269,360 calories and 9,324 grams of fat.  Only.

…SUITS OF ARMOR.  A full suit of armor that knights wore in medieval times could weigh anywhere from 40-90 pounds.  The replicas pictured above weigh in at 55 pounds each, so I’ve lost all THREE of them.  One of those replicas, by the way, can be yours for only $2,998.00 – get out your credit card and act now!

If you have ideas for other items I could compare my weight loss to, leave them in the comments section!  No need to do the research or math – leave that up to me – I’m good at it!

Keep it up, David!


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