From The Archives…

December 16, 2011

Thanks for all the well wishes yesterday, folks. I really appreciate it. I’m feeling better today, but not 100% yet. The sneezing and the runny nose seem to have largely disappeared, but I’m still achy and my throat is still sore and I still feel tired, so… I. Am. Still. Sick.

Blerg.

I was digging through the Keep It Up, David archives and I came across a recurring post I used to put together, where I would get creative with the big & tall catalogs that came to my house. Basically, I would create comic strips using the photographs from the catalog. They were called “Big & Tall Catalog Model Drama” – clever, huh? I used to get a catalog at least once a week, which provided plenty of material for these comic strips, but then I called each company and had myself removed from their mailing lists, and, well, “Big & Tall Catalog Model Drama” fell by the wayside.

It’s been over a year since I published a “Big & Tall Catalog Model Drama” post, and they were kinda popular in their day. Since I’ve barely left the house in two days and have nothing interesting to write about, I thought I could send you all into the weekend with a few laughs, if you happen to like my strange sense of humor. If you don’t happen to like my strange sense of humor, well then fuck you.

Sorry, that’s the DayQuil talking. Here are the links to all five installments of “Big & Tall Catalog Model Drama.” Enjoy!

Now my brain is churning about new ways in to interject some humor into this blog…

Keep it up, David!


Haircut and Haul

July 22, 2011

There were a couple things that happened yesterday that really made me feel good about myself – and after this tough week (with my three-pound gain), they couldn’t have come at a better time.

1) Haircut.  I warned you all last week that I was gonna get a haircut, and I got one!  I had Heather, my hair stylist, take before and after pictures, so here’s the before:

And the after:

Lookin’ sharp, right?  I love it.  I’ve trusted Heather at Glendale Salon Spa with my hair for years now, and she’s never let me down.  When I went up to the front desk to pay, Renee (the manager and quite possibly the owner – not sure) looked up from what she was doing and blurted out “Oh my god, you are so hot!”  That was my cue to start blushing.

Every once in a while, I catch an unexpected glimpse of myself – usually, it’s a reflection in a window or mirror, where, for a split second, I don’t realize that it’s ME, and all I see is this thin figure and I wonder who the hell it is, and it catches me off totally off-guard.  Once I saw a shadowy figure in my bedroom and thought someone had broken into my house, and I was ready to bolt for the kitchen to grab a knife before it sunk in that the person that I saw was ME in a mirror.  I suppose, living in this body every single day, that I’ve gotten accustomed to my own point-of-view, and I completely love and appreciate those moments, scary as they might be, when I see myself, and this body that I’ve worked so hard to change, from a different perspective.

When I first looked at the above photos, on the little screen on my camera, I had one of those moments again.  I saw the before picture and thought, ‘Who is that in the background?  I don’t remember anyone else near us…  WHOA! That’s me, in the mirror!”  I zoomed in and looked again… at my long neck… the absence of additional chins… what appears to be pectoral muscles… and it felt really wonderful.

2) Produce Haul.  Nothing quite lifts my spirits like a stroll through a produce department.  And I was due yesterday for a little shopping trip.  After eating breakfast and lunch, I barely had any produce left in my house – just a single lonely tangerine, some alfalfa sprouts (originally bought for my kick-ass sandwich for five – see the recipe here), and a few remaining kumquats that came off my friend Robert’s tree:

Since I wasn’t in the mood to create a kumquat/alfalfa/tangerine recipe (note to the producers of “Chopped” on Food Network – that could be a challenge on your show!), it was time to go to the store.  Lucky for me, there’s a Whole Foods a few blocks away from my salon.  So I zipped over there after getting my hair did and ended up bringing home a nice big produce haul that I can’t wait to dig into:

There’s some glare from my flash – sorry about that!  Starting from the top right and going clockwise, we have:  pre-washed kale/chard salad mix, baby carrots, strawberries, blueberries, a red onion, 2 tomatoes, sliced mushrooms, black grapes, cherries, zucchini, santa rosa plums (they’re small and tasty), 3 peaches, 4 valencia oranges (I plan on juicing them), 3 nectarines, a green pepper, a cucumber, a bag of celery hearts, bananas, and a container of broccoli and cauliflower.

And, I saw another new-to-me stone fruit that I can’t wait to try, since the apriums I wrote about yesterday were so delicious.  Anyone know what these are?

They’re called mango nectarines.  I know nothing about them, except that they’re still pretty firm, so I’ll let them ripen a bit before digging in (and sharing the experience with you).

OH – one more picture to share.  The Glendale Whole Foods is right across the street from the Casual Male Big & Tall store that was one of 3 stores I could shop in when I was at my heaviest (subsequently, they got hundreds, possibly thousands, of my dollars over the years).  Well, the Casual Male used to be across the street.  I must not have been paying attention, because at some point in the recent past, the Casual Male and the gas station next door were demolished, and construction started on this building:

I don’t know what that building is, or will become, but I checked online, and the Casual Male moved about 10 blocks away.  Not seeing the Casual Male there reminded me of one of my all-time favorite blog posts – from last fall, when I said good-bye to shopping at big & tall stores FOREVER.  If you haven’t read my open letter to Casual Male, click here – it’s a good read that I’m quite proud of, and when you get to the picture of the store in my car mirror, know that I spent 10 minutes aligning myself in the parking lot, blocking traffic, to get that shot to line up.  I do it for you, blog readers!  NO.  That’s a lie.  I DO IT FOR ME.  Your enjoyment is an added bonus, and my knowing how much you enjoy it is the best added bonus of all.

Keep it up, David!

COMING UP:  There was another great moment yesterday that I want to share, but since I thought this post was getting a little long, I’m going to save it for next time.  It involves a major Los Angeles landmark (no, not Angel’s Flight)!


Big & Tall Catalog Drama 5

December 5, 2010

I don’t need to buy Big & Tall clothes anymore, but the catalogs still come to my house.  Who knew the models’ lives were so drama-filled?

 

 

Previous Installments:

Big & Tall Catalog Drama 1:  Click Here

Big & Tall Catalog Drama 2:  Click Here

Big & Tall Catalog Drama 3:  Click Here

Big & Tall Catalog Drama 4:  Click Here


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